10:32 PM
GOODBYE BITCH! ive moved.
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11:08 PM
you know how i said i wouldnt be updating soon i guess that just never works!
ive come to realise that the one person who can make you the happiest can infact make you the saddest too.-->just something random but very true.
you know i loved my blog the way it used to be..how everything was so so random to everyone and nothin made sense to anyone but me.maybe a once in a while random one yea grace?
haha something funny just happened!both my brother and i arent suppose to be online so he sees me online and blocks me and i do likewise!haha for goodness sake we're both in the same housE!
anyways saturday went not too bad.sat night was FUN!i met my mums frens from UK..we went to arab street for Turkish food and then shisha!at the turkish restaurant the owner or whoever came up to me and asked me if i was hindu or christiani was like "no im muslim!" he rushed over the counter and gave me that eye figurine thing you know the thins for "nazar" i really was pretty lost..he was like "you muslim you better keep this!" uhuh yea..anyways then we thought we'd go to MOS but the Uk people were all like oh we've got that in UK take somewhere sporean.so we headed to mohd sultan!haha!yea they asked for sporean what!anyways we didnt last there either so like after while we left.anyways here's something my mum was looking through and then she gave it to me and she had tears in her eyes..
I hear you have a new addition,
A sweet little gal who is quite a magician,
Transforming each normal adult who sees her
To a comical fool just trying to please her.
She'll wrap you around her little finger,
As around her crib you often linger,
Searching for what can make your hearts twirl--
The adorable smile of your baby girl.
Cherish each moment while she's still small.
Collect sweet memories for later recall.
For when she's grown up and on her own,
You'll wonder where the time has flown.
AHH..how it just sucks growing up sometimes!
--dunt you just sometimes miss the times you'd sit by the door and try so hard to tie your laces and then your daddy just comes and does it for you and you sit there in great admiration and wonder "WOW..THAT'S SOME MAGIC MY PAPA CAN DO!"
--dunt you just miss the times where you dunt have to eat by yourself and your mummy just feeds every spoon filled with food right into your mouth and all you do is go "AHHH[ with mouth wide open!]..
--oh man dunt you wish that you could turn back time and go back to the very first day you attended playschool with you parents by your side leaving in the hands of unknown people.and the 3 hours you there for seem to just never end and then you cry and look for your mummy and repeatedly ask your teacher "what time is it?"she tells you the time and your like damn if only i could tell time id know how long more id have to suffer here![i was just 3]
--dunt you miss the times you had falling down and crying when trying to learn how to cycle and then tell yourself "IM NEVER DOING THIS EVER AGAIN!"and the next day you grab your bike and try again just because everyone else bigger could do it I COULD TOO!
--dunt you just think about all the times when you played with dolls,those weird barbie dolls who we'd leave them half naked lying around cos we lose thier clothes whenever we try to change them!
--dunt you just miss playing with make-up and making a mess out of your face and still going to admire yourself in the mirror and then look at your mummy go "dont i look pretty" and your mummy will go yes my dear and you look back and realise omgosh what a liar la.
--dunt you miss the times you'd fall asleep on your mums lap and a volcano could erupt less than 5m away and yet you'll still be snoring away.it's like it was the safest most comfortable place ever!
--dunt you miss watching all those cool barnay, winnie the pooh, power rangers and sesame street shows!God!
--dunt you look back and just think about all those absolute crazy stuff youve done the past years..like how i remember drinking out of a fountain in australia when i was 6 cos i was just so thirsty!!but like id never do that NOW!
i guess as much as we all hate to face the fact that we're growing up..we really are!we're becoming OLD!ergh!dunt worry we shall all age gracefully yea?hee..
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7:49 PM
completely defeated the entire purpose of even changin my password!so some entries had to go.
hmm BIO PRACT---
this is how eveyrone reacted after the exam
"its over..let's not talk about it!" noone wanted to talk about it!NOONE!it was that bad..
anyways im addicted to this song too bad people its no exactly an english song its called "say na say na" from the movie bluffmaster!
thanks grace and mel for the messages!thanks!
i dunt think ill be updating for a while firstly all major papers start next week..for example CHEMISTRY..and ive decided there is no way im giving up on that subject..come on its me..its possible!haha okay this is the first time ive ever looked at chem in such a positive way!AMAZING huh!
oh today,at tuition shahmeer was damn cute lah!he kept showing us his finger which was by the way bruised badly..then we start gossping bout farhan!haha yay i finally have someone to gossip with about farhan..and just because thw whole booklet i was doing was a VS booklet...he kept saying this "oh what school you doing ah..then looks at my paper and goes oh VS!you doing VS paper..wow my school must really have excellent standard..then he went on braggin as usual!i told him that by saying that t also meant i had a high standard but he refused to believe me..stupid VS boy!then to shut him up i showed him shahnawaz's number in my hp haha!boy then his lips went completely sealed!haha..anyways!thats all..
i miss you.=)
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8:04 PM
tadaa..its the beginning of exams!
lets see
EL 1 went alright
ML 1 went alright surprisingly too.
i guess you can really pretty much expect the same answer after every exam "oh it was ok" doesnt everyone say that?
anyways so today jean came crying to me at the concourse.i mean honestly i didnt have anything to say to her!what's there to say?everything is way over babe!
i just had a chat with someone i hadnt chat with in like months.hahe poor fella seemed so depressed!hello im supposed to be the stressed one here!anyway i dunt really understand why some people are so hard on themsemves..you know ive realised i dunt understand a lot of things..somehow whenever i question someone the person doesnt seem to know the answer either!
anyways.
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6:51 PM
GRACE!:im so sorry..dunt worry your not the only bugging me.blogger has been quite an ass really recently
Okay Friday came and went..its not really how I expected things to turn out but yea I guess ill put it this way whatever happened,happened for the better.thanks for all the fun times LEE..hoiyan doesn’t read my blog but still hoiyan weldone babe!you handled the team very well and tho you guys didn’t win.it was an awesome effort!MEL I LOVE YOU!
Anyways drama night!!so I headed to school and I was damn early..so I met up with van and charis then we went for lunch at kap with mel,lyon and nic!it was quite fun!then we walked back..and I played badminton well I stood there with a badminton racket and like manage to hit some of the shots!anyways then they decided to be really good and wanted to see ms ho for a/emath..then they wanted me to accompany them..so me being the nice me I grabbed a pen and followed them so I called ms ho
Shab:ms ho hi can we see you?
Ms ho:okay shabana is it?
Shab:no wilder wants to….
Ms ho:(cuts me out) wilder?
Van: (from the background) not wilder!VAN!!
Shab:oh yea van!!
Ms ho:but you are shabana right?
Shab:YES…can come out or not?
Ms ho:yah…and she hangs up…[so rude!]
Then she comes out..and we do work..and she teaches us..and then we lose concentration and start talking and gossiping bout close to almost everything!and everyone!
Then…I was looking for my work..
Ms ho:haha loser you cant find it.
Charis:ms ho you’re a teacher you cant say that!
Shab:HAHAHA {stares at ms ho]
Ms ho:its okay its shabana she wont have any heart feelings lah..(tries to cover up)anyway its reverse psychology or some shit thing..
Shab:anyway ms ho you were the loser one yesterday in front of the whole level your pc didn’t work like 5 times during exam briefing!LOSER!
Everyone laughs at her!
Haha so this conversation went on and we started talking bout rubbish!and like completely deviated from maths..then I went for drama..then it was drama night!lets just say it was a great turn up!the show was awesome!
Alright I hate answeting the phone and being called “hey shakeera baby!” forgoodness sake cant you people tlel the difference..im like 6 years older and my name is shabana and I sounds different!
Anyways here’s to you and you..Well you done done me and you better felt it I tried to be chill but you so hot that i melted I fell right through the cracks and i'm tryin to get back before the cool done run out i'll be givin it my bestest and nothin's gonna stop me but divine intervention I reckon it's again my turn to win some or learn some i won't hesitate no more, no more, it cannot wait i'm yours Well open up your mind and see like me open up your plans and damn you're free look into your heart and you'll find love love love listen to the music of the moment maybe seen with me Ah, la peaceful melodie It's your god forsaken right to be loved loved loved loved Loved
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6:19 PM
first things first im not supposed to be here!im freaking supposed to be at cheer prac or drama..both have really been taking up a lot of my time!i wanted to quiet cheer but thne i realised it will be so unfair to hoiyan and the rest of the sec 4s cos everyone seems to be wanting to quit but we're all hanging in there together..cos afterall we are in this together!drama night is like friday [intersect] saturday!haha the intersect comes in due to SETS!i learnt today that intersect means "and" and union means "or"!!that's way besides the point!last night i came home with this really bad aching shit painful right shoulder!(which btw is still pretty bad) and i was having a freaking headache so i thought fine ill sleep first and then wake up at 3 plus to mug..but guess what i slept right thru till 4.45 and i even had a freaky dream!i was so scared it was so dark!i was ALONE..and i hid under my blanket and i felt like something so wrong could have happened..whatever it is i completely feeling that way!everntually i woke uup and looked at BIO..then i was too scared to be in my room alone..so i went down and sat in the kitchen atleast i had my maid..so then school was utterly weird..AND i hate weird days in school..then it begin to rain and i needed to come home so badly to mug so i did..i came home and i had lunch with my mum and then i remembered what meryl said bout doing amath/emath so i did just that!and i felt so good..anyways then THE PHONE RANG and my mum just had to come into my room to dammit answer it and not only that she remains on my bed and starts talking really loudly!then my sister walks in and lies beside her on MY bed and starts playing with some stupid zip..so i get really annoyed cos here i am trying to study and there they are being so inconsiderate so i went downstairs to my brother's room..i lay on his bed and i just broke down..i guess it was really a build up of every damn thing!im one person who cannot cope with stress!firstlty i dunt know how to and secondly im not that kinda of person.ive been hiding away from everything but i guess i have to face it i am a lil stressed out..esp with mids and the fact that every damn teacher is preparing us for really bad results upon looking at the papers and elee can even go to the extend to say yes this is to ensure that all bio girls get distinction for Os..like hello!ergh..anyway that breakdown was so overdue its just that i kept running away from it.everything's so baldy planned cheer finals are on sturday too..dance night was last week and dramanight is friday and saturday and MID YRS BEGIN ON TUESDAY..SOMEBODY EXPLAIN TO ME THE LOGIC IN THIS PLANNING CONSIDERIN THE FACT THAT WE'RE SEC 4s!!well had a really meaningful talk with jamie grace and mel.s.w!i realised how im the kinda person who doesnt like to face problems..i just noticed that i keep forgetting everything that happens i just keep putting everything behind me and i keep moving on..i realised i never solve my problems i just forget them.like social stuff and everything i just move on and dunt care about those kinda stuff..im not sure if this is good?but yea..it's like i just dunt care!i mean no point solcing such problems right everyone's gonna say different things..it'll just make things worse..sigh..some people have just got to learn to grow up!"People never know how special someone really is to them until that someone leaves, but maybe sometimes its important for that someone to leave for a bit, so your given that chance to see how special that someone really is!" -there's a thousand things that i could say to make you come home!lol..before she says anything-thnks van!
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9:53 PM
IT'S ALL A MATTER OF TIME.i miss your smileand the way your so mine!ANYWAYS.......i dunt understand!1.i dunt understand how its possible for me to gain and lose weight so easily2.i dunt understand how some people change boyfrens like changing underwear!3.i dunt understand how i fell in love[just a lil curious..]4.i dunt understand how people do so well in thier studies[with tons of other commitments all at one go]5.i dunt understand how its impossible for friends to not be able to understand the term "friends" and yet call themself one6.i dunt understand why the world is the way it is7.i dunt understand why God is God?8.i dunt understand why people say life is always unfair?9.i dunt understand why animals were created[food?]10.I JUST DUNT UNDERSTAND ALOT OF THINGS IN LIFE!
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as our lives change from whatever we will still be friends forever
cos that's what friends are for!
a sister in disguise